Brewology

- Something origami does not work out for me in any way.
- Have you eaten for a long time?

French cheeses cannot be imported, but French uranium waste is allowed. See, don't get confused.

There are two ventricles in the heart of a man. One for vodka, the other for a snack.

If foreigners send SMS messages for a child's operation, can the child be considered a foreign agent?

In order not to anger poor people, expensive analogues of cheap drugs should be sold not in pharmacies, but in boutiques.

Saxophonists, when kissing, always touch the vertebrae with their fingers.

Zhiguli is when you are afraid to drown the car, because you think that it will no longer start.

Russian officials have a belief that if in a conversation with Putin they say "thank you very much, Vladimir Vladimirovich" less than 5 times, the offshore company will fall off first, and then the donkey.

When Igor finally quit drinking and smoking, his wife pointed out other shortcomings.

Parents talking about their children:
- What kind of bedtime stories do you read to your child?
- Good ones, so that he falls asleep quickly. And you?
- Scary ones, so he won't ask to read them again.

First they wanted to do compulsory vaccination, then the census, then Halloween. Then they decided to combine the two.

I was sitting at home, and suddenly I heard some rustling in my closet. I opened it, and it was my wife's clothes going out of style.

Sometimes I open my closet, look in it for a long time, and realize that two-thirds of the clothes I keep in case I go crazy!