If I put myself in your place, I would be glad that everything happened that way. No, of course I would have experienced the first time. Awareness would pass later. It is better to lose a person when he showed himself in difficult conditions than to receive negativity when you do not expect it. I found a new adventure here -
https://www.together2night.com/sugar-momma-dating.html I'm not even sure I want to plan a wedding now. But I advise you to think carefully before looking again.